HER

When I was about 23 years old, I suffered one of the most horrible and traumatic events in my life. I was hanging around the wrong group of people and got myself into some serious trouble. I remember feeling like this was the end. There was no way that I could recover from making such bad mistakes. In my despair my best friend at that time had contacted one of her friends and they asked me to meet them at a church. Church was the last place that I wanted to be because I was so wrapped up in all the drama that was going on in my life. I just wanted to be left alone. I had a serious argument with my so called boyfriend and I just didn't know what to do to make the situation better. My friend (and her friend) tried to act as mediators and as they talked I began to zone out. I sat there and all the talking that was going on around me slowly began to fade into low murmuring.

As I sat in the first pew of the church wondering how I could be stupid enough to get myself into the position I was in, I stared blankly at the empty pulpit in front of me. For several minutes I just stared at the empty space and as tears began to stream my face I shuttered inside. I felt like the entire world was against me and I had no where to run. Black girl lost I was indeed. And then...all of a sudden...I saw her.

The low murmuring that I was barely listening to from the three other people in the church went completely silent. A woman appeared in the pulpit. A beautiful black woman. She looked young but I knew that she was older than me but not by too much. She was speaking but not to me. It's like she was speaking to a crowded room even though it was just four people in the sanctuary. It was like watching a television show on mute because I couldn't hear a word she was saying. Even though I couldn't hear her voice, I could tell that she was saying something very powerful. Her hand gestures, her facial expressions, and her stage presence exuded attention, class, beauty, and power. I sat in awe of her. I had never seen such a person in my life!

"That's you." I heard a voice softly speak. "Me??" I thought. How could such a powerful woman like THAT be me?? Now, at this time in my life, I wasn't saved, wasn't living for Christ, and wasn't in church. At this time I didn't know who this voice was, so I really just deemed it a crazy thought in my head. But in retrospect, I now know that it was the Holy Spirit speaking to me.

In the picture above, I was blessed to speak to a room of mothers and daughters about the power of their personal stories. When I looked at this photo, I was amazed to realize that this image is almost the exact same image that God showed me 10 years ago!!!

For it is not yet time for it (the vision) to come true. The time is coming in a hurry and it will come true. If you think it is slow in coming, wait for it. For it will happen for sure, and it will not wait. Habakkuk 2:3

Speaking about my research at a symposium a few weeks ago

God showed me a vision of myself that would manifest at an appointed time! I think God showed me this version of myself at my lowest so that when He placed my feet on higher places I could remember that moment. He saw my greatness and power before I did and it took ten years for the vision to come to pass! Ten years is how long my process took for me to stop hanging around the wrong people, GIVE MY LIFE TO CHRIST, gain understanding of my identity, get my life back on track, and get a renewed heart and mindset. Ten years makes sense when you take all of that into consideration. It's important to remember that everyone's process is different.

I'm glad that God sees me for who I am and not for what I've done. I'm thankful that 10 years ago He introduced me to that amazing woman who looks back in the mirror at me everyday. Has God introduced you...to you??